You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize