tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
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We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
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