it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
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Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
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But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy