I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom