I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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