These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
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