Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize