i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
