Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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