Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
