some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize