kristin has been a bad kristin
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
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