I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize