well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
