I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
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i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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