Porn is love you can see.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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