Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Randomize
