this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Randomize