I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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