Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize