shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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