Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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