ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
