Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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