About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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