do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Randomize