I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
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