yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
