Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
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