She's JV to your varsity
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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