They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Randomize