dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
He better not be in your backpack
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
