Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.