The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
