there was a trapeze. enough said
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
