Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
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