glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
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