he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
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