Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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