So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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