Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
