He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
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Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
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