Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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