It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT