her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
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