FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
