okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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