I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize
