It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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