He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
